I Went on a Mental Health Retreat — Here’s What I Learned
For the past few weeks, depression has been kicking my ass, even though I do all the “right” things. I take medication, I go to therapy, I exercise, I eat healthy, I journal, I use substances in moderation. I could not think of what more to do to make this awful feeling end. Then, I got an email.
“In-person SKY Happiness Retreat for UMD Community SEPT 10–12!” read the subject line.
“The retreat offers an in-depth experience of effortless meditation, breathwork, yoga, SKY (Sudarshan Kriya Yoga) Meditation, and more,” the email continued. “Research has shown that SKY may reduce depression, anxiety, PTSD, stress, and addictive behaviors.”
I saw the phrase “may reduce depression” and decided that I had nothing to lose. I signed up.
Before the program, I continually got texts, emails, and phone calls from the SKY instructors to make sure that I was coming to all of the sessions, because if I didn’t, I would have to pay $55. It felt very sketchy, but again, I had nothing to lose. I assured them I would attend all three of the four-hour, in-person sessions and both of the hour-long online sessions.
The first session was this past Friday night. I had already decided that I was staying in this weekend, so I was perfectly fine with the timing. When I arrived, I was instructed to grab a yoga mat and take off my shoes. I felt kind of gross not wearing shoes, but I complied.
I expected these sessions to be hours of individual meditation, breathwork, and introspection, but SKY turned out to be very community-oriented. At the start of the session, we formed “teams,” which we met with throughout the retreat to discuss our thoughts and feelings about the various activities. My team was composed of such a diverse set of people, from different races, countries, gender identities, sexual orientations, ages, majors, and experience levels with meditation. It was so cool.
We first learned the SKY breathwork exercises. It had never occurred to me that you could make your breath do anything other than breathing normally, so I learned a lot during this part. We did four different breathing exercises and ended with a meditative rest, and we repeated the cycle at each in-person session. After finishing the first day’s cycle, I felt a peace I have not felt in months. The anxious knot in my stomach dissipated, my mind felt still and clear, and I felt entirely present in that moment. It was magical. During the meditative rest, I went into this space of almost-sleep, where I had such vivid thoughts and memories. Several childhood memories flooded back to me, though when I woke up, I could no longer remember them. It was the strangest thing. Other people also experienced the same thing. This combination of vivid thought and inner peace convinced me that breathing exercises and meditation work. It is not just for hippies — everyone deserves tranquility. I plan on doing this daily now, because though the peace I felt did not last forever, experiencing it even for a short time daily will really help my mental health.
Other than breathwork, we did exercises to boost confidence, learn the science behind breathwork and meditation, and create a sense of community. We formed a dance circle where everyone had to copy one person’s dance moves. We sat with others and took seven minutes to tell our “life stories.” We played games and ate lunch together. We wrote anonymous compliments for each other. And we always ended our activities with reflection and sharing our experiences. That was my favorite part of the entire retreat — finding a community that shares an interest in learning about the higher self and finding holistic ways to better oneself. Though I may never see these people again, I am so glad I got to share this weekend with them.
While I cannot share the specific breathwork exercises we did, I can give my biggest takeaways that I think everyone could learn from: breathwork and meditation work, and community matters. Finding both individual and people-based ways to soothe mental health issues is incredibly important, and you don’t need a retreat to do it. YouTube has plenty of videos on breathwork, and you likely already have a community of family and friends. Utilize them.
I had to turn down a lot of plans this weekend, but I think that is okay. Prioritizing my mental health and long-term improvement is always worth the sacrifice, so I can keep learning to love myself above all else.
